1997

1/6/97 Chris Landsea noaa-hrd

Responding to the response of the 'star trek storm in the gulf' nomination, Chris submits the following.

In the 22nd century, the Federated planets attempted to implement Dr. Bill Gray's idea about burning heavy petroleum to make clouds of carbon black in the periphery of the hurricanes to reduce their strength (Gray et al. 1977, _JAM_). Not only didn't the hurricanes weaken, but they intensified and developed - in addition to the classic hurricane 'eye' - a new feature later termed the notorious hurricane 'nose'. Soon thereafter Hurricane Ho made landfall over Washington DC and sneezed the city into obliteration. The Federation, realizing that this was a good thing, allowed the seeding to continue.

1/6/97 John Knaff csu-atmos

Some of the folks around atmos periodically engage in games of Quake over the net. One of the weapons at the player's disposal is a grappling hook. Well knaff, being the true wx weenie that he is, cannot seem to stop calling it the "grauple-ing hook". Also in the verb sense: when asked after a game, "hey john, how did you get up on that ledge?", he responds, "well i graupled it with my grauple-ing hook".

1/13/97 Avery Wittmeyer Witt son

Kelley was cleaning Avery's window and noticed a green length of rubber string laying on the roof outside the window, but held on one end by the closed window. When asked what this was, 5 yr old Avery replied that was his weather string. When it's blowing around, he knows to wear something warmer. When it's wet, he knows to dress for rain...

1/27/97 Steve Hodanish nws-mlb

Steve was relating an experience of his where he had consumed a number of alcoholic beverages and how he was feeling fine until he went to bed, at which time his enjoyment pretty much ended in a hurry. He was asked if he got 'bedspins', to which he replied: "i went from clear air mode to a tornado on the ground in about 3 minutes!"

1/27/97 Ian Wittmeyer csu-atmos

When driving back to Atmos from lunch on a recent day, Mark Branson and Ian Witt noticed some cumulus clouds over the foothills. After Ian jokingly said "it was going to fire", Mark recalled the line uttered by the air force general from the movie 'Wargames': "Take us to Defcon 2." (defcon=defense condition). Ian then said it should be called "Chasecon 2" in this case, and then he proceeded to define the different Chasecon levels, where 1 would be a the occurrence of a tornado, 2 would be the observance of a rotating mesocyclone, etc. and the lowest alert status would be Chasecon 5, which would just be the presence of some towering cumulus clouds.

NOTE: Mr. Branson agreed to plead guilty to the misdemeanor charge of "aiding and abetting a weather weenie" in return for his testimony against Mr. Wittmeyer. He is now officially entered into the WWW witness protection program (WWWWPP).

2/10/97 Kim Elmore nssl

After the Weather Weenie of the Week moderator accidently sent the voting list out to the regular email list, Kim sent back the following, "Ah... I'll bet This is a spurious case of WWW Vote Advection; I'd check the boundary conditions and rerun this case :)".

2/11/97 Chris Jackson & Brian Crumpler ou-atmos

These guys are taking Meteorology 1004 taught by Dr Josh Wurman. Wurman assigned a homework set including analyzing several skew-t data and deciding what time of day they were taken. Brian apparently has archived skew-t's over the last few months for reasons only a weather weenie might understand. So they found several of the hw skew-t's in this bunch and used them for the assignment. The next class Wurman goes into this long explanation why one of the skew-t's is a 00Z and not a 12Z sounding, but it turns out that it WAS a 12Z sounding. So Chris raises his hand and politely explains that it is 12Z and produces the evidence. Wurman was apparently "bummfuzzled", first that he was wrong and second that someone actually KEPT an archive of skew-t's. Good luck on your grades, kids.

2/11/97 Hannah Wittmeyer Witt kid

Before leaving for work and the school bus, Ian sat down to watch a little Weather Channel as usual. Hannah, 6, came and sat down next to him and said, "dad? you know sometimes i just watch that weather thing and i don't know why". Said Ian, later, "Isn't that awesome?"

2/24/97 Donna Landsea

Donna felt obligated to purchase the children's tape and accompanying booklet, entitled "I'd Like to be a Meteorologist" for some friends who are expecting. Said tape contains such catchy tunes as "The Water Cycle" and "Hurricanes and Tornados".

2/24/97 Matthew Biddle ou-geography

Matt sent the WWW list moderator several emails in which he tried, to some extent, to dissassociate himself with the true Weenie crowd. An anonymous person wishes to nominate Matt for the following, and make sure that Matt gets his Just Desserts for true Weenie behavior. More incriminating evidence was brought forward but the list moderator thought it wise to stick to the above. Insists anonymous person, "He IS the KING WEENIE".

3/2/97 David Mocko nasa-gsfc

Commented that United's wall carpet design at front of cabin looked just like a X-Z cross section through Ft Collins of potential temperature produced by the RAMS model from a downslope wind event.

3/2/97 Hannah Wittmeyer Witt daughter

Yesterday on the way home from school, Hannah asked Ian, "daddy, when are we going to have storms again? i like storms, the way they look and the way they sound. storms make the sky look really neat."

3/18/97 Dave Mocko & Mike Meyers nasa-gsfc & nws-gjt

Each of these guys was nominated independently for noticing IMMEDIATELY the change of The Weather Channel map studio. Mocko called Zach Eitzen up out of the blue and wanted to know what Zach's thoughts were on it. Meyers came home from work, turned on TWC and likewise said to Ian Wittmeyer, "Hey look at the new setup". It was uncertain, however, if Meyers was noticing Christina Abernathy's dress line or the actual new image format...

Eric Gross fsu

Following a thread of putting a chaser cam on the dash of a chase vehicle which would then display video images to a web URL, he predicts the following scenario:
Oh yes, what a winner of an idea! I can see it now, as us desk-bound chasers follow the adventures of our more fortunate brethren during the heart of the tornado season.

My virtual storm chase, May 23, 1997:

0735 AM -- Log on fails (home: AOL provider)
0805 AM -- Log on fails (work: university server down)
0817 AM -- View: front of a sleazy, run-down motel.
0832 AM -- Site crashes in mid-download
0847 AM -- View: McDonald's drive in line.  Bubba in rusted Ford pickup in
	line ahead is picking his nose
0857 AM -- View: McDonald's drive in line. One car closer to window.
0915 AM -- Server can't find URL
0929 AM -- View: Interstate
0938 AM -- View: Interstate. Sky clear.
0959 AM -- Site crashes in mid-download.
1013 AM -- View: Interstate, back of cattle trailer. Six large, technicolor
	bug-splats on windshield.
1039 AM -- Windows locks up attempting to open Netscape.
1101 AM -- View: Interstate, corner of Snickers wrapper visible to lower left.
1141 AM -- Boss walks in while accessing site; abort 
1209 PM -- View: A service station. Tan, nubile blonde pumping gas into old
	Trans Am at island ahead. View somewhat obscured by drool on windshield.
1242 PM -- View: U.S. Highway. Back of large, dusty International Harvester
	tractor towing a harrow. Driver is spitting something out the cab
	window. Looks like Copenhagen.
0105 PM -- View: An Alsops
0122 PM -- Server can't find URL
0123 PM -- Netscape crashes trying to reconnect
0124 PM -- Site crashes in mid-download
0145 PM -- View: Miscellaneous Highway, somewhere in Texas panhandle. Sky:
	scattered cumulus, little vertical development.
0228 PM -- View: pulled off on side of road; nothing ahead. ?
0239 PM -- View: obscurred, looks like by a map.
0315 PM -- Windows freezes opening Netscape.
0321 PM -- View: railroad crossing, boxcars going by in a blur
0347 PM -- View: front of convenience store; geeky-looking, slightly overweight
	pale white male, roughly 30, leaving store with a six-pack of Dr. Pepper
	and a bag of Doritos. Assume this must be the chaser.
0418 PM -- Server can't find URL
0423 PM -- View: Farm-to-market road. Vehicle going the other way, looks like
	Setzer and Pietrycha.
0437 PM -- View: Farm-to-market road. Back of Setzer and Pietrycha's car.
0458 PM -- Netscape freezes opening site.
0508 PM -- View: Off side of road. Two other vehicles ahead, also off the road.
	Five white males, three holding video cams, two setting up tripods. 
0515 PM -- View: Same as before, except everyone looking off to the left, two
	shielding eyes against glare, one pointing.  Sky ahead full of cumulus,
	none with noteworthy development.
0517 PM -- View: Same as before, except everyone is packing up and going back to
	vehicles.  30-ish white male noted earlier at convenience store is
	returning towards camera; looks dissapointed. Note stain on T-shirt,
	possibly burrito.
0541 PM -- Log On Fails (back at home, AOL provider)
0559 PM -- Log on Fails
0613 PM -- View: U.S. Highway, somewhere in the Texas Panhandle.  Sky ahead
	three-fourths cumulus, a couple of building towers noted.
0654 PM -- View: U.S. Highway, somewhere in the Texas Panhandle. Towers noted
	earlier have peaked and diminished.
0721 PM -- View: U.S. Highway, somewhere in the Texas Panhandle. From angle of
	the sun it looks like we have turned around. Sky ahead shows a large,
	rock-hard, striated tower and back-sheared anvil with an overshooting
	top, rising over the horizon in the far distance.
0741 PM -- Site crashes in mid-download
0815 PM -- View: U.S. Highway, somewhere in the Texas Panhandle. Beautiful view
	of the setting sun playing across the top of previously mentioned
	distant supercell.  A quick check to TWC confirms that this meso,
	located over SW Oklahoma, is now attended by a tornado warning and
	producing large hail.
0855 PM -- URL not available.
0915 PM -- View: Interstate, blurred tail lights.
0955 PM -- View: Convenience store, previously noted white mail buying a sixpack
	of Budweiser and a bag of Cheetos.
1028 PM -- View: Front of sleazy, run-down hotel.
1029 PM -- Wife comes and threatens me with bodily harm if I don't turn off the
	computer and come to bed.

3/31/97 Charles Edwards ou-met

Charles is nominated for the following three things.

4/7/97 Reverend Ted Joe Miller

During the private prayer ceremonies for the groom and the groomsmen at Greg and Julie Stumpf's wedding, the Father Miller prayed that good weather may always be in Gregs future. Remembering that most of them were severe weather nuts, he clarified that the term "good" was relative.

4/28/97 Dr William Gray csu-atmos

Following the somewhat well known question who is the only meteorologist to have his face on the cover of Time (answer: Rossby), Dr Gray started talking in class about the good old days when he was stationed in the Azores, "The day Rossby died we flew skew-t's at half staff."

5/27/97 Ian Baker, Mike Weissbluth aster

The following is a glimpse inside some weenie brains, trying to guess if a 6pm softball game would be rained out, as written by Ian

"yassir, clouds building up nicely. mike and i were talking about the competing forces for rain tonight, and had it something like this: 

prob(rain) =	prob(softball) +
		prob(mike on bike) -
		prob(jeep covered) +
		(const)*(amount of water on lawn in past 2 days)
however:
d(softball)/dt is maximized at or after 5:30
(i think const*ln(x) worksquite nicely),
and d(bike)/dt is maximized between 5-6
(a square wavefunction),
while d(jeep)/dt is zero, or a constant.

i think if weissbluth had driven his car today, or if i hadnt watered my lawn monday night, we would be ok. as it is, it is merely a matter of imbalanced force. as you can see, the clouds are building nicely.

6/9/97 Gail Cordova csu-atmos

In the e-mail invitation to Prof. Wayne Schubert's BBQ for the folks who helped out during the hurricane conference, Gail notes Wayne's address as
1419 Wind Field Dr. (actually Winfield Dr.)

6/30/97 Danielle Gibeault uwisc-atmos

Some time back, Danielle's parents found a dog at the local animal shelter by the name of Max. Her sister started training him in the usual way, ie Sit, Max!, Down, Max!. Danielle, however, taught him something more valuable. At the command of Vort, Max!, this rather large dog begins to rotate rotate cyclonicly, occasionally causing disturbances!

7/28/97 Stephen Hodanish nws-mlb

Ho's NWS colleagues in Melbourne nominate him for inadvertently slipping his love of tornadoes into a recent Area Forecast Discussion.
	AREA FORECAST DISCUSSION
	NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE MELBOURNE FL 
	149 PM EDT MON JUN 23 1997
...
	SHORT TERM...GENERALLY FROM STUART N...THREAT OF STORMS WILL BE 
	DECREASING ALONG COAST AS C BRZ CONTINUES TO MOVE NW ACROSS 
	PENINSULA. CONVECTION WILL CONTINUE TO INCREASE OVER S 1/2 SXN OF FA 
	WITH ONLY SCTD STORMS OVER N 1/2 OF FA. S OF STUART...STORMS OVER ATL 
	WILL CONTINUE TO MOVE INLAND BUT ACTIVITY SHOULD DECREASE WITH TIME 
	AS THE AFTERNOON PROGRESSES. GIVEN LATEST SOUNDING FROM THE 
	CAPE...THREAT OF HEAVYR AREAS OF RAIN CONTINUES...BUT WITH STORMS 
	MOVG DON'T SEE SIGNIF FLOOD THREAT PROBLEM. SVR THREAT 
	MINIMAL...ESPECIALLY HAIL AND DAMAGING WINDS (THETA E PROFILES 
	MINIMAL AND WET BULB ZERO VERY HIGH)...HOWEVER LANDSPOUTS (SHORT 
	LOVED WEAK TORNADOES) CANNOT BE RULED OUT GIVEN BOUNDARY INTERACTIONS 
	AND SATURATED ATMOS.
...
	HODANISH

7/28/97 Charles Edwards

Hereby nominated for building the Dillocam, a weighted "turtle" with a video camera in it, defying the documented odds, and the taunting of Matt Biddle and company.

8/25/97 Steve Hodanish nws/mlb

While Hodanish and Ian Baker were out to dinner one night at a steakhouse, Steve told the waitress, "I'll have the Fujitas.", in all seriousness meaning the fajitas.

9/15/97 Mark Herndon ou-grad

Matt Biddle and Mark took Jerry Hodak of WXYZ TV Detroit on a guided chase this Spring. The weather failed to cooperate so at a slow moment, Matt got his motorcycle helmet with a small fake satellite dish (that rotates) out for gags. Mark put it on and proceeded to do an interview on camera which was used on the 11 pm news. So looking goofy as , Mark told the interviewer he was "seeing a lot of oncoming shower activity in the area." They were later told by WXYZ that many viewers thought the contraption was real and they wanted to purchase one to use on their boats!

9/15/97 Ben Huffman uw-madison

This summer, Ben was out chasing a storm in Minnesota one evening and stopped in a small town gas station. While cleaning the windshield, he started flirting with some of the girls who lived there. The tornado sirens began to wail. Ben went wild in a "TWISTER" like way (jumping and yelling) as the girls just looked back towards the sound unmoved. As it turned out, this town turned on the sirens every night to announce curfew!

11/3/97 Dr Kelvin Droegemeier ou-metr

Dr Droegemeier was explaining the basic idea behind vorticity to his Meteorology 2103 class at Univ of Oklahoma, when he recalled an anniversary dinner with his wife. He took her to the Eagle's Nest, a rotating restaurant in downtown Oklahoma City.

During dinner, he decided he wanted to compare the vorticity of the restaurant to that of a tornado. So he put a sugar packet on the window ledge, and calculated the time it took to reach the packet again. He then quizzed his waiter about the approximate radius of the room, and menatally calculated the vorticity!

11/17/97 Steve Hodanish nws-mlb

A new low was reached in the NWS Melbourne office yesterday. During evening shift turnover, Randy discussed how things were looking good for severe weather the following day. Scott from evening shift then asks, "Yea, things sound good, but how excited is Hodanish?"

11/24/97 Don Dazlich csu-atmos

Don's wife Angela called up to nominate Don. Don was going through a bunch of mail they'd gotten when on vacation, mumbling off sender's names, when he said, "Here's one. It's for a rebate for a new car at the Subaru-GCM place". Angela looked at him quizzically. It was really from GMC. Don said later that now it makes him want to go out, get a GMC truck and rearrange the letters...